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Fashion Heart & Soul

The art of being busy

10 August 2018

One of the things humans are most proud of in our lives is how busy we all are. Being busy became a necessity, even an obsession for some of us. I’m saying that out of experience, I’m not judging others, I’m mostly judging and observing the younger version of myself, a free and spirited teenager versus my current version of a tired mother of two. In both cases I acted the same.

At one point we are almost ashamed to say that today we are just chilling. We are actually obsessed to occupy all our time and then complain about how exhausted we are. We are so stressed out about the little things and we add importance to meaningless stuff. We are sad, angry, always complaining and very irritated all day long. But Oooh, how we love saying “I’m just sooo busy and I have so many things to do!”

We feel like we value more and we deserve more attention if we work until we drop. Stopping is shameful.

I have insomnia since childhood and close friends know how awful it was back then and how it still affects me. I just can’t close my eyes if I didn’t have a productive day or I have something to take care of the next day. Being creative and artistic doesn’t help either, I constantly have to create and my mind doesn’t stop. These are my faults, I know them and accept them as a part of me, but being a mother has taught me so many things. One of those things is that being busy is NOT a virtue.

It’s a constant struggle for me every day, but I finally understood that I can proudly say “Today I’m not doing anything, I’m just chilling.” Yes, I still cooked, did laundry, bathed the girls and wrote an article. But I didn’t do all those things with the attitude of a busy and stressed out person. Today I stopped and tickled the girls on the laundry before putting it away. Emma spilled some water on the kitchen floor; after I helped her clean up, I dragged her through the house on the towel and I loved her laughing. Anna got fussy while I was doing the dishes and without telling myself “Oh, not now, Anna! I have so many dishes to do!” I took her outside for a walk. I let the girls splash as much as they wanted during bath time and I decided to only see Anna’s rolls dancing while she laughed, not the water spilled on the floor.

I’m not saying that being busy is a bad thing, not at all! I think that’s obvious! We do have to work: “first we take care of urgent things, then important ones and finally all the other things.” (Little poem learned in childhood). But at the same time we must find a balance between work and rest, between stressing and relaxing, without feeling guilty if we just do nothing sometimes.

When we were taking these photos I was constantly stressed out. I worried about Anna not falling asleep in her father’s arms, I worried about Emma missing and waiting for us, I kept thinking if my husband is hungry or if we have enough gas to get home that day. But I decided to stop. I decided to stop and enjoy the quiet and the lovely photographer who I loved spending my time with. I enjoyed the nature, the lovely wind and the sound of the leaves dancing. But mostly, I enjoyed my new dress from Osaha in Eliana mall, in Brasov. Such a lovely, comfortable dress, with a vintage vibe and perfect length for me. I never looked for cross-over dresses because, let’s be real, moms can’t really wear them as we are mostly spending our time on our children’s level. But this dress doesn’t open like it would normally do, it is like a normal dress with another piece of material on top. That’s what I loved about it. Actually the entire Osaha store had my heart. It’s a home for hundreds of dresses, all kinds of shapes, fabrics and prints. It’s so awesome! Well I’m not actually surprised as it is a family business for  decades. The sales lady actually works there for more than 10 years. Osaha is simply a family. The only thing missing is a cup of tea and some biscuits and we got ourselves a family evening in the living room.😊

Getting back to our subject, don’t forget we need to simply stop sometimes. For the sake of life. For the sake of our family, our mental and spiritual health. For the sake of little moments and things that really bring value to our lives.

And when we are asked “What are you up to today?”, sometimes let’s just answer by smiling and saying “Nothing.”🙂

 

 

Fashion Heart & Soul

In the garden with Monet

13 June 2018

I’ve been away for longer than usual, I’m sorry for that. I will post more about what I’ve been doing lately soon, but for now I want to explain this ambiguous title first. I hope that the following words are self-explanatory.

I’ve always been misunderstood as a teenager and I received many harsh words without actually doing something wrong. Having an artistic spirit, a melancholic character and daydreaming all the time is not a happy combination for a young person wanting to make friends. I’ve never tried to fit in, my mom always taught me to be myself and do what I love and I am good at. But people took that as superiority and you know what they say: “You’re either like us, or against us.” So I found shelter from judgment in my passions, in music and art in general.

A few weeks ago I was explaining Emma about Monet’s paintings and I remembered my quiet place as a teenager. I never told anyone this but when things got too loud in the real world, when things got too heavy in my heart, when words got too harsh and people got too mad, I went to my quiet place, which was Claude Monet’s garden. I imagined myself walking on his property, finding him in the garden, quietly painting one of his famous pieces of art. I looked at the sky, the flowers and at his brush touching the canvas, while listening to the beautiful song of birds. That was my favourite quiet places as a teenager.

Well, after a certain age I thought that people are not doing that anymore, I thought that adults are wise enough not to judge someone just because they are different. But here I am, finding myself judged for how I raise my children, for what I do and what I’m passionate about, for what I read and how I decorate my house, just because it’s something different. And they got to me for a little while, but I’m so blessed with a husband who loves every piece of me and helped me get past them. One other thing that helped me when I was down was going to my old quiet place and I loved it. Going there brings me back peace and strength and I found a way of bringing my imagination to reality. By clothing, of course… 😊

This outfit makes me feel like myself. This outfit brings me joy and shares a little piece of my mind. Plus, it’s so comfortable and easy to wear. My trousers are from H&M, my lovely shirt and shoes are from Asos and my precious hat is from magazinuldepalarii.ro . These photos were taken in the lovely Hilton Hotel in Sibiu, one of my dearest locations ever.

So, do you have a quiet place of your own? I would love to read about it in the Comment section down bellow, I need some inspiration. 🙌

Fashion Heart & Soul

Just us two, on her birthday…

21 May 2018

I remember that moment when she first grabbed my hand. She was a few minutes old. I remember her weight on my chest, her smell, even the temperature of her little body, when I first held her. I can’t explain why I remember those details so vividly. I knew then that she’s the pure definition of love and that I would move mountains for her. After that came entire days and nights of holding, loving and keeping safe. Don’t be fooled, she did those things for me. She taught me real happiness, she helped me exceed my limits and appreciate real values. She healed me from an egocentric and a superficial character. She taught me to love and even to give myself, not sacrifice myself. Yes, I choose to give myself, because “sacrificing” sounds too harsh for us, moms.

Today is her birthday. My Emma is 3 years old. And all this time she overwhelmed me. I don’t even know with what because there’s no clear definition, I can’t explain what I feel when she holds my hand or she squeezes me in her little hands, when she puts her curly head on my face. I can’t explain my senses when she smiles or she tells me “I adore you, mama!”. When she stares at me when I read her stories and when I ask her what’s wrong she says “Thank you for looking after me, mama…”. Or when we are out and I buy her a pretzel and she asks “But why, mama, why do I get a pretzel?” just to hear me say that I love her and that she is worthy.

Many people say that she is too sensitive, too attached, to mature, too engaged and different for her age. But I don’t think that a “too” placed in front of qualities changes them into faults. She’s amazing just as she is. Emma will change the world, that’s for sure. I know it. Because she already started with me.

We managed to go out just the two of us, after having her little sister, Anna. It was short and I had to constantly assure her that daddy isn’t sad and Anna’s not alone. But every minute was amazing because I could enjoy all her gestures and all her words. Our joy was even greater because we didn’t just go out. We went to the secret magical garden of out friends from City Flowers, best flower shop in town. There we had a tea party and we enjoyed some cake (Emma made sure that I just get to taste mine 😁), surrounded by the perfume of millions of flowers.

But can you guess what really made us feel like princesses? That’s right! Our lovely dresses from Eliana Mall! My ballerina dress (as Emma calls it) is from You & Me Fashion, obviously. It has lovely details, very subtle sequins that offer a lovely shine. It’s so comfortable and it’s a statement piece that doesn’t need accessories, in my opinion.

Emma’s dress, on the other hand, turned everybody’s head. It comes with a beautiful bag and a hair accessory. I worked hard to convince Emma not to nap in it. She twirled all day long, while starring in the mirror. It has lovely details, done with great taste. It’s not too caky but it does have that something pretty that makes it stand out from other dresses. A very nice lady actually stopped us on the street to ask me where is it from. I gladly told her that Emma’s lovely dress is from AMB Fashion in Eliana Mall from Brasov. She even congratulated me for going to my little sister’s performance at kindergarten, she said it was very nice of me 😂.

And that’s how we had an unforgettable experience, us both, being at the right time, at the right place, dressed with the right clothes. I take this opportunity to thank everyone who helped us create such memories, starting with our amazing photographer, our lovely friends from City Flowers and more important, I thank Eliana Mall for offering us amazing collections of clothing to choose from every season. With their help, we lived as princesses for a day.

 

Heart & Soul Parenting

Are you raising your kid different than me? Great, let’s be friends!

9 May 2018

There are no other people on this Earth who criticize and fight more than… us moms. The interesting thing is that, instead of showing more love and compassion towards another, because that’s what we want our kids to see and learn from us, we immediately turn exactly in the type of person we don’t want our kids to become. And yes, I’m using plural because I too am a mother and I’m telling myself this firstly.

How could we ask our kids not to say mean things, when we as adults can’t control ourselves on the phone, when we speak badly about someone else who does things differently?

How could we expect our little ones not to develop an egocentric character, when we can’t accept the fact that a mom found another way to handle this parenting hoopla?

How could we get angry when our kids would do anything to get their way and would step on anyone including us, when we are so full of ourselves and believe that we are parenting experts, criticizing any solution, other than our own?

How could we tell our kids to stop talking badly, when we can’t stop offending other moms?

How could we expect our little ones to be peaceful, when we constantly throw shame and frustration on others?

How could we tell our kids to watch their mouth, if we can’t stop our own?

Why do we run after things that don’t exist? Evey mom is perfect for her own children. There’s no such thing as a perfect recipe or standards. And if there were, is it really worth fighting over it all, just because we do things differently? I’m not talking about extreme cases when a child is treated badly, I’m talking about small differences that create real avalanches between us moms.

We shouldn’t let individualism ruin our relationships and push us far from one another. Now, when we are more exhausted and sensitive than ever, when we all know just how hard this motherhood thing is, let’s drop that judgment shield and embrace the beauty of diversity.

Let’s not hide behind the idea of perfection, let’s just realize that we have things to appreciate and learn from one another.

Are you raising your kid different than me? Great, let’s be friends!

Heart & Soul Lifestyle

What I wish for ?

27 April 2018

What I wish for my birthday?

Happiness? It’s everywhere. In my loved one’s smile, in my husband’s kiss on my forehead, in my children’s soft touch, it’s in the perfume that flowers spread and the wind in my hair, it’s in the green of the grass and the blue of the sky. That’s pure happiness.

Health? Evey morning I can see Anna’s little face light up and I can smell Emma’s curly head. I can walk barefoot through the grass and hold my family tight. I can laugh and I can cry, I can say “thank you” and I can say “I love you”. Oh, I got enough health.

Love? I first saw it 24 years ago, when my mom first hugged me and she flooded me with her love since then. I see it in my husband, every morning when I find my coffee on the kitchen table. I feel it burning inside every time I hold my babies. I surely don’t miss love.

Peace? I have it with me every day since forever. I feel it in every “thank you” I say in my prayers. My peace can’t be taken or given by anyone.

Wealth? Oh, I got so much of it! I just wrote it all down. It’s in my happiness, love and peace. That’s my wealth and I wouldn’t trade it, not even for the world. Because my treasure can’t be stolen, it doesn’t loose it’s value and I could never grow out of it.

That’s the only wealth I need today and all my remaining days on this Earth.

 

Heart & Soul Lifestyle

Romance in marriage?

5 April 2018

I find myself smiling when people say that romance is gone after the wedding, especially after having kids. Expressed love becomes useless, even impossible when kids are in equation. Well, allow me to disagree.

First of all, I have solid proof in front of my eyes every day. My parents, my in-laws… oh, I wish we could have at least a tiny piece of the wisdom and love that they share in their married life.

Second of all, what’s more romantic than finding every morning without a mistake, a coffee on the kitchen table, exactly how you like to drink it? What’s more romantic than finding your husband at 3 AM, deeply sleeping with a chubby baby on his chest? What’s more romantic than his sweet smile when he walks through the door at night, holding out your favourite takeaway food? What’s more romantic than that 2 words message sent randomly during the day? What’s more romantic than hearing him negotiate with your toddler 10 more minutes for you to sleep in the morning?

I don’t think that romance disappears. I think we just stop seeing it sometimes, because it transforms into something more real, something so much stronger and meaningful. I think that’s real romance. And if you’re telling me that things might change in 10 years, I will gladly say “I hope so!”. I once again look at my parents and I pray that one day we will get to experience their level of romance.

Heart & Soul

Our hearts beat together

27 March 2018

Our hearts beat together. We feel the same way, we love the same amount and we think alike.

If Emma gets hurt and cries, Anna cries with her. If Anna cries, her big sister runs towards her with a toy or one of my bandanas (because she knows Anna loves them 😊). If I’m sad, Emma hugs me, if Anna is sad, Emma hugs her too.

If you both, my lovely girls, need my arms, I will hold you as long as you need because you have equal rights. There’s no measuring our love.

 

We are one. Everything I do for you, I do for myself. Your pain is my pain and keeping you happy is all I need to do for me to be happy too.

 

I love you more than I love myself, that’s for sure. And I need nothing in exchange. I’m so blessed to be your mother, anyway. I need nothing but to love you. You make my life an enchanted fairytale.

Exhausting, but enchanted fairytale.

 

Heart & Soul Parenting

This little hand

16 March 2018

This little hand once tickled me from inside my belly when I was pregnant and it didn’t let me sleep.

This little hand grabbed my hand when you were only a few minutes old and it was magical.

This little hand scratched your face so bad when your lactose intolerance was at it’s peak.

This little hand scratches me when it’s 3 AM and all you want is to be attached to my body like we once used to be.

This little hand grabs everything, from toys, your sister’s socks, curtains, my hair and I don’t have very much left.

This little hand will learn to play an instrument and will delight my ears and my soul.

This little hand will rest in my hands when I will teach you matters of the heart when you’re older.

This little hand will hold a diploma when you will graduate and I will be there, proudly clapping as hard as I can while you’re smiling to me.

This little hand will maybe one-day wear a beautiful ring and it will want to hold another hand instead of mine.

This little hand will wave so happily when you’ll be leaving for your own home and it will break my heart to pieces.

This little hand, your little hand tells a love story, our love story, sweet little Anna.

This little hand.

 

Heart & Soul

This is for women

8 March 2018

This is for all women around the world.

 

This is for all mothers out there who raise their children as best they can. This is for mothers who haven’t slept longer than 2 hours in years. Who get up every morning exhausted, but they take a good breath and they put the biggest smile on their faces for their family. For mothers who work and when they get home they find strength to play with their kids. For stay-at-home moms who didn’t get dressed up to go out in such a long time.

This is for women who proved that they can do a man’s job. That they are worthy of their position and they can do what they are called to do. They are able to work and they are free to talk and take action.

This is for women who suffer. Who suffer a great deal that I don’t even know about. Who wake up every day thinking it may be their last. Who look at their children wondering if they will see them grow. Who don’t show pain when it’s breaking them.

This is for women who think so much of others and so little of themselves. This is for women who gladly give up on their last piece of bread to feed another soul. For the ones who give and wait for nothing in return. For the ones who love unconditionally.

This is for women who lost so many things in their life. Who lost their loved ones. Who lost their hair. Who lost health and wealth. Who lost dreams and hopes. Who lost their earthly possessions for their eternal life.

This is for women who spread so much love around by living a simple life.

This is for women.

This is for you. You are a hero, born of a hero, raising heroes.

You are amazing just as you are and you are enough. You can change the world and you are doing it already just by BEING.

So women around the world, thank you for being.

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